What would you do if you knew you were going to die?
Sadly, my incredible father in law Ray did. He knew the end on this mortal coil was near. There was no panic, fear, nor anger.
He loved.
In the weeks since his passing on February 25th, 2026, Roman "Ray" Kowalyk soaked up every last minute living life and loving his family.
He faced death with grace, honor, humility, courage, and his fighting spirit never diminished. It s a blessing that Ray suffers no more from a devastating cancer diagnosis that took him so very quickly.
He passed peacefully at home, surrounded by the love of those dearest to him. I’m forever grateful for our last moments together, where he sat on his couch with me and showed me his many awards and proclamations from Ukraine. Ray received the highest civilian honor from a nation he loved, right up until his dying days.
Much of my father-in-law's remarkable life story was only fully discovered by us after his passing. Ray wrote his own obituary, sharing details about his life that we only found out about after it was posted online.
A humble and private man, he rarely spoke of his extraordinary upbringing and accomplishments.
Ray was born in 1949 in a labor camp in Neu-Ulm, Germany, and immigrated to the United States with his family in 1950 aboard a military ship before becoming a proud American citizen.
A lifelong member of the Ukrainian-American community, Ray was devoted to CYM Buffalo, St. Nicholas Ukrainian Catholic Church, the Dnipro Ukrainian Cultural Center, ODFFU, OUN, and the Ukrainian-American Sportsman Club.
Professionally known as “The Plant Dr.,” Ray built a respected career in horticulture before founding Trident Landscapes & Consulting.
Following the 2014 Euromaidan Revolution, he dedicated years to supporting Ukrainian soldiers and hospitals. For these efforts, he received numerous honors, including one of Ukraine’s highest civilian recognitions.
His living room was always full of big boxes, ready to he shipped to Ukraine. They contained clothing, medical supplies, money, anything that was needed on the front lines in the war against a brutal, murderous dictator in Vladimir Putin.
One of the greatest blessings of my life is that Ray was Ashley’s earthly father. For that gift, I will forever be grateful. The strength, compassion, and devotion he poured into her are part of the beautiful legacy he leaves behind.
Ray loved America, cherished Ukraine even more, and carried a deep pride for his heritage and community. Most of all, he adored his grandchildren beyond measure. Our kids were his joy, his light, and his living hope.
Our Ukrainian community did him right. Hosted a huge "living memorial" where Ray got to hear firsthand how much he was loved and respected. For most, that moment comes after your passing.
Before he left us, I made him a promise: to honor and cherish Ashley, Maksym, Emeryk, and Victoria until my last breath. His legacy of love now lives on through them.