Joe Biden gave my high school commencement address in 1984. Surgeon General C Everett Koop gave my college commencement address in 1988.
Truth be told, I don’t remember what either of them said. I remember being excited, exhausted, and nervous about crossing the stage. I remember it being hot in the robe and the bobby pin holding the mortarboard poking my head.
After one ceremony, I went off to college and after the other, I went to graduate school. I remember the feeling that my life was moving forward, though I can’t say I was exactly sure how or if it was even me directing it. I was doing the things I had been told my whole life that I should do. Doing what everyone said would make me successful.
No one ever asked if I liked it or if it was fulfilling. I had no idea what sort of job I would get at the end. I was good at math and science. I had the opportunity to do these things, and the thought that I wouldn't do them was never entertained.
I was smart and had the opportunity to go to college, so that’s what I did. Four years later I had a biochemistry degree. A few years later, I earned a graduate degree in molecular biology. Several years later I was offered an opportunity to enter a graduate program in Epidemiology and Public Health. It was an unexpected opportunity and I took it. I didn’t give it a lot of thought. I left my job and went back to school again.
What I chose then was based more on opportunity that showed up rather than sought out. I don’t have any recollection of making a clear choice of my own. It gives me perspective now. Perspective I didn’t have at 17 or 20 or even 25.
What would I tell my 17-year old self-knowing what I know now? Would I make the same choices again?
Some I would and some I wouldn’t. Generally speaking, making choices based on what you are good at rather than what you dream about is the best advice. Sometimes a person is lucky and those things are the same, for most it is not. There is room in your life to make a good living and have time to spend on the dream.
I’d tell myself to notice what you are good at and turn what you are good at into a skill that is needed in the world. A hard science education gave me every skill I have needed throughout my career in science, business, and politics.
Be an expert generalist. Always say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’. Learn to write, learn to think, learn to problem solve. Become comfortable, and even good, at public speaking. These are skills that are transferable to anything you choose to do.
Work hard, pay attention, develop very thick skin, and some compassion too. Learn to stand up for yourself. Approach everything as if it is hard. Know what your feelings are, but never act based on them. Feelings in the moment aren’t a choice, but the action you take next is. Choose wisely.
When the inevitable unethical choice is placed before you, make the choice that allows you sleep at night. There’s no going back once you go down the road of being a liar or a cheat. The only real thing you have that travels with you wherever you go, for as long as you live, is your integrity. Guard it well.